You're Not Convinced: Bridging the Gap Between Knowing and Doing in Fitness

"Your life is what your thoughts make it."  - Marcus Aurelius

Ask anyone to name their life's top priorities; chances are, their health is at the top of that list.

Our health is everything: mental, physical, emotional, and even spiritual. The unhealthier we are, the more life sucks, and the harder things are for us and everyone around us. 

We know it's important, yet, for whatever reason, many of us fail to consistently do what we need to do, even though we know what needs to be done. 

Then, when we don't do what we should, we get pissed off at ourselves.

So, why is this the case? Why do we often see parents who sincerely wish to instill healthy habits in their children struggle to apply these same principles to their own health?"

Why do so many of us grab poor-quality takeout when we could eat a nutritious meal at home?

Why do we sit on the couch and watch TV at night when we can do some movement that would benefit us?

The answer is simple. While we believe these things are important to us, we haven’t convinced ourselves they are.

The Ways We Try to Convince Ourselves

I'll say it plain and simple. To convince yourself that a goal is important, you must work towards it.

This goes for our health, well-being, and anything else we aim to achieve.

Want to be a professional basketball player? Play basketball. 

Want to be a musician? Make music.

Want to be a writer? Write.

Yet, when we begin to embark on healthy change, it can be easy to try finding other ways to convince ourselves and make it feel like progress.

You may say, "Now is the time!" and go out and buy yourself a year-long gym membership. 

If you don't like the gym, you might buy some exercise equipment for your home. 

You may watch inspirational videos on YouTube or try to find the perfect workout routine that's out there for you. You could buy a smartwatch to track your activity or even post motivational quotes on your social media and declare to the world that now is the time to get in the best shape of your life.

The problem here is that while it may feel like you're convincing yourself that your health is important to you, what you're trying to do is quite different. You're trying to motivate yourself. 

Motivation Creates the Spark, While Action Sustains the Flame.

If we look at it like starting a fire, motivation is the initial spark that ignites the fire, while action keeps the flame sustained. 

When we talk about getting motivated to exercise, we often refer to the initial surge of enthusiasm and determination. This is that spark we feel to get things done. You've felt it, we all have, and it's a great feeling.

You may feel an adrenaline rush that gets you off the couch, into your workout clothes and gets your ass into gear. Motivation is necessary; it tells you what needs to be done and gets you pumped. However, it's not enough. Sorry.

Action, on the other hand, is what sustains the flame. Consistently maintaining that fire by adding fuel makes the fire grow even larger.  The action doesn't need to be extreme; it just requires consistency.

Transitioning from the spark of motivation to the flame of action involves a shift from thinking to doing. Motivation is in your mind, that's all. In contrast, action is in doing; believe it or not, it convinces your mind, not vice versa. 

To drive home this point, let's look at an example of two women talking about their recent endeavors in their health and fitness. 

An Outside Perspective of Motivating vs. Convincing

Imagine a group of women having Sunday brunch together. Two women there, let's call them Rachel and Monica, are enthusiastically discussing their recent efforts to better their health.

Rachel is really excited and is super motivated to get back into shape. She tells the group, "I joined a new gym six months ago and started taking classes that they have to offer; they're great! I also put together a nice little home gym with a treadmill, a stationary bike, weights, resistance bands, yoga mats, and stability balls, and hung a TV on my wall! I also have this really cool fitness app that tracks how I'm doing."

At first, everyone is impressed. One of the women then asks about the classes and the home gym, as she's interested in getting in shape. 

"Well, I’ve only gone to the gym about a dozen times, once or twice a month or so," says Rachel, "My schedule has been packed, so I've only gone to a couple of classes, but they've been excellent! I haven't started working out at home yet; I'm just waiting for everything to calm down before I get into a routine". 

Then there's Monica. When it's her turn to share, she speaks with quiet confidence. "Well, I've been hitting the gym six days a week for the past six months, just trying to stay consistent. Even on days when work piles up and time is tight, I make it a point to go. Sure, there are days when my workouts are less intense, maybe just a brisk twenty-minute cardio session or some light weights. But what's surprising is how often I feel energized once I start! Some nights, I leave the gym feeling more revitalized than when I walked in. Honestly, I don't even think much about it anymore; I go because it's become a part of my daily routine." 

Which of these two women seems more committed to improving their health and well-being? Who would you be more convinced it is important to? 

The one who's actually doing the work, that's who. 

It works the same way when we're convincing ourselves. You can't think your way into being convinced, just like someone else can't convince you without showing that they've put in the time and effort. Monica has her flame going, and Rachel keeps trying to spark it.

Good or Bad, Doing is Convincing.

Just a quick note: It's crucial to convince ourselves to do beneficial things, but it's equally important to keep an eye out for the opposite.

Say you want to start going for a walk after dinner each night but find yourself watching the same TV shows on the couch and eating ice cream. You want to break that habit but find yourself doing it each night, to your dismay. You keep hitting the couch because you're convinced that is what is important to you.

It's the same with any bad habit. Going to the grocery store and buying processed junk food instead of something healthier when you know it's bad for you? You've convinced yourself that's what you should buy. 

Want to get up early but hit the snooze button ten times before getting up? You're convinced that's how you start your mornings. 

Want to save money but find yourself online shopping for shit you don't need? I think you get it.

The First Step: Convince Yourself it Matters

So, with everything we have learned about convincing ourselves thus far, you're probably asking, "Where do I start?".

Before setting out on any goal, no matter what it is, you have to convince yourself of one thing, or you'll never get anywhere. 

What's that one thing? That you give a fuck.

That's it. It's that simple. If you're not convinced you give a fuck about what you're doing, there's no way in the world you're going to stick to it.

So the question has to be asked, how do you convince yourself that you give a fuck? Like the fire, you must figure out how to keep that flame going. 

As we discussed, you need consistent action to keep that flame going. So ask yourself, "What is an action I can do consistently, long enough, to convince myself that it's important to me?"

I've got good news for you: It's not that much. 

Take the example of starting to walk every day to get more exercise. Think about how much walking you can do each day you know you can accomplish. Not HOPE you can, but KNOW you can. Consider any external factors that may derail you from your goal.

Let's say it's a ten-minute walk around the block. Sure, that doesn't sound like much, but imagine that you set a goal to walk every day for ten minutes. 

After a few days, you've walked three times for thirty minutes, big deal.

But what about after ten days, twenty, or a whole month? 

Walking ten minutes a day for thirty days is the equivalent of walking five hours, not too shabby. That in itself is pretty damn good, but it also comes with developing a new habit.

Here's where the magic happens. As this walking solidifies over time, an exciting shift occurs without you even realizing it. There comes a point where it feels unusual not to go for your daily walk. It becomes a part of your routine because you have convinced yourself it's important to you.

It's no longer a matter of convincing yourself daily; it's simply what you do. Every day, without fail, you're telling yourself, "I give a fuck about walking ten minutes. Therefore, I give a fuck about myself."

Not to mention, there will be days when you feel like Monica with the gym and feel more energy on the walk than when you started. On those days, you may do two laps instead of one. Maybe even three. Then, at some point, you'll go from a daily ten-minute walk to a daily twenty. That's what we call progress.

Don't Break the Chain - The Seinfeld Method

One strategy I absolutely love that can do wonders to help convince yourself something is important was utilized perfectly by the star of my all-time favorite show.

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld, one of the most successful comics ever, was once interviewed about his process for writing jokes. 

In a nutshell, his method involved putting up a calendar and ensuring that he would put an X on each day he wrote jokes. He knew the importance of writing consistently, so he did his best never to break it. After a while, a chain would form, and he wanted to keep it going. If he missed a day, he would break the chain. 

A strategy like this can work wonders because, in his own way, Seinfeld was convincing himself that writing jokes was important to him. He did this visually, seeing that he has kept a streak for X amount of days, so it must be important to him. 

Additionally, he now has an added motivator to keep pushing him forward. While the goal was to write more jokes, develop an act, and become a successful standup comic, I bet there were days when there was only one thing important to Jerry: to get that X.

Putting the X's into Action

If this X method sounds interesting to you, give it a try. If you can think of another way to track your progress, then go for it (and let me know if it works!). 

You can do it for anything: exercising, flossing, drinking a glass of water each morning, playing with your cat for ten minutes (if they let you), whatever you want to start doing consistently.

The key is consistency, though, and to not break the chain. Keep that chain going, and before you know it, you'll care about the chain. It's easy to skip flossing before bed, but you'll probably think twice if it means breaking a thirty-day streak.

You can track your progress using an app or print out a habit tracker and place it somewhere visible in your home if you want to go the extra mile. Additionally, share your goals with those you live with to add a layer of commitment. Either way, track those Xs and build that streak. 

Look at it this way: something is better than nothing, and something consistently is way better than nothing.

Way better. Way way better. Way way way way way way way way way better.

My Challenge to You

This week, I challenge you to pick one habit you want to form and create a streak for it. 

This could be anything, but make sure to keep it simple. Whether flossing, walking, meditating for ten minutes, or any other habit you would like to instill, record your X and try to keep the streak going. 

Set a goal for how long you want to keep the streak alive (thirty days is a good number, but it’s your call), and see how you feel as that streak grows. If you live with someone, post the streak somewhere in your home for yourself and others to see.

Key Takeaways 

• Prioritize consistent action to transform health goals into reality, going beyond the initial motivation.
• Reflect on your unique health journey, understanding your specific challenges and what has worked for you in the past.
• Start with small, manageable steps in your health routine and steadily build them into larger, sustainable habits.
• Use practical strategies like the 'Seinfeld Method' to track and maintain daily health commitments.
• Acknowledge the continuous nature of health improvement and view each small step as part of a larger journey.
• Empower yourself by taking responsibility for your health choices and aligning them with your personal goals and values.

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